March is Endometriosis Awareness Month, so I thought I would talk about my experiences of it.
Endometriosis is when the uterine lining grows outside of the uterus, around the uterus, ovaries, stomach and other places such the lungs. There isn't that much research done on the condition, and so far they haven't found a single reason as to why it occurs, although it is believed that retrograde periods are to be a big factor.
In September/October of this year, I found out that I have endometriosis. If I'm really honest, it's a bit of a bummer. It feels like each period is worse than the last. There is so. Much. Blood. I don't even know where it comes from. It's completely overwhelming. A couple of times I have passed out from the amount I've lost (which is just what you want on a train or any other public transport).I use period underwear, and am very much a firm believer in them, but even they are no match for my uterus.
There's also the uncomfortable feeling in the days before my period. If you imagine having several rocks in your shoe, except that shoe is your uterus and the rocks are actually boulders. Let me clarify, this isn't particularly painful, just very, very uncomfortable. I can't sleep. I can't sit still. I feel agitated and everything gets on my nerves. There's a list of things that I enjoy, and that feeling is not on there.
Let us not forget the nausea. Nausea after sex. Nausea on my period. Nausea off my period. I feel sick, so I don't eat. Then because I don't eat, I feel more sick. It's a vicious cycle. God forbid I go on a night out. My period hangovers are something else. I've drunk half a litre of vodka before I've even left my flat and not felt as bad the next morning. It makes me anxious to be anywhere without a toilet, and that is no way to feel when I'm already worried about how my trousers are going to look when I stand up.
I'm not sure if it's directly related to the endometriosis, but I get awful mood swings as well. I made fajitas the day before a period and I was fumed. I don't really understand why I was so cross because I love fajitas. But I was. I have also cried three times in one evening the day before my period. There is a limit to how much I will cry on my period, and I keep crossing it.
The doctor put me on the pill, but that just made things worse. So I don't know what I'm going to do. It's not severe enough for surgery, but it still affects my day to day life. It's not fun. Support those you know who have it. Hopefully in the coming years more research and alternative treatments will come to light. Until then, I will sit with my pity party and hot water bottle and try a gluten-free life.